Ok so after YEARS OF LEGAL BULLSHIT we’re finally getting a Marvel owned Spiderman movie that falls in line with the current Avengers franchise. That means cameos and crossovers. That means not so subtle jabs at the overwhelming popularity of these movies as they literally print bags of money at box offices around the world.

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I’ll be honest, I’ve never been a big fan of Spiderman. But I never liked Thor or Hulk either, and I had never even heard of some of these other heros, so I’m giving Marvel a shot at selling me on this version of spidey. I thought his small part in Civil War was a good intro, although I admit I was more happy about Marisa Tomei being Aunt Mae than I was seeing the debut of Spiderman.

So now we have this trailer. It has everything I expected and its cool EXCEPT for the fact that it just doesnt feel right. Like at all. It’s a high school kid freaking out and being uncomfortable with his new role as an Avenger, along with being equally uncomfortable with girls. You’ve got the overweight friend who gets in on his secret identity, and Tony Stark dropping by to remind us all that this movie ties into the Avengers and its not just another shitty Spiderman reboot. Totally expected and accepted. There’s clearly some inner-struggle going on in Peter Parker’s head, but we aren’t given any clear info on what that is, classic trailer move. I’m 100% on board. But then we get this:

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…everything up to this point indicates that Peter Parker doesn’t have the confidence or the mental fortitude to pull of something as major as single handedly holding together a fucking ferry that had been split in two. Even in the Marvel world this hits me as a stretch. Maybe he’s only there helping Ironman, in that case then sure I’ll accept it, but this isnt an Ironman movie. Typically the named hero of the movie leads the charge in the big battle. So I’ll have to wait and see how that gets explained. (also, I see you Lady Liberty… such a try hard move by the director/graphics department. Do less)

All of that aside, there are 2 things that stand out in this trailer that really get the juices flowing. First, just a little excitement seeing Michael Fucking Keaton back in the superhero world (OG Batman whaaaat)

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He’s the villain obviously.. Whats not so obvious is figuring out what villain he is. Apparently he’s Vulture. (probably a better villain than the other Birdman Keaton recently did) Like I said I was never a big Spiderman fan so maybe that was obvious to others. After a couple minutes of research, turns out he’s an electric engineer who built a harness that allows him to fly and gives him super strength. Seems simple enough.

The second thing that got me going was the last image in the trailer…   spider-man-homecoming-trailer-1-111443-216834.jpg

I need this to get here fast so I can spend stupid money on a night at the movies.